02/26/25
feeling: pretty fucking bad.
watching: Ammy Robinson
latest obsession: Cookie Run Kingdom
last song played: Ready Steady by GIGA
current weather: light rain + snow, 34°F
i.. need to do better.
plain and simple.
how do i do better when i've been giving it my all for the past five years?
i'm not really sure how to answer that. truly.
i want to not be so volatile. i want to not hurt the people i care about. i want to be a good person. but i don't know how to do all of that.
i don't know how to be good.
i've never been good.
and i don't know how to fix that about myself.
maybe if i let my ex try to fix me.
maybe if i just stopped - in general.
i dunno.
i dunno......
02/11/25
feeling: achey :/
watching: Austin Green
latest obsession: my top thirty title:')
last song played: Desire by ATEEZ
current weather: cloudy, 18°F
ough i'm EXHAUSTED. top 30 !! t21 !! i did it!! now i have the worst headache ever but it's partially b/c i was playing with my dog this morning and he scratched my cheek LOLZ but that's okay we were rough-housing :') still. Achey ouchies exhaustion. I did it tho !
i've taken the past two days off of class to rest up and get back on track. take my notes and get prepped for the tests coming up again. etc etc etc. i'm getting around tho! and i'm almost ready for everything coming. my bed is made. i'm showered for the next day or so. now i just need to make a server for the next run i may do... Eugh. Thinking about it. Eughdhskjhdf. But that's okay. I have a few days to do that:')
how have you all been ! i know you can't really answer, but i hope you've been well. Taking care n everything. I'm trying to be positive after how hard the event was on me but it's a bit rough still. I'm still proud of myself though. Idk. Idk........
ANyway. Take care friends! I know I haven't updated in a week or two so I wanted to get a mini diary update out. All the love ! <3
